Thursday, November 10, 2011


Yesterday was our FIRST SNOW OF THE YEAR  ......
(granite today it was almost all gone haha or a slushy sloshy mess)
BUT it came down it stayed around, didnt just melt when it hit the ground, and it was beautiful/perfect just like almost ALL first snows seems to be--- the kids at school where all so excited.  Its like it was a foreign thing that they all where so thrilled to be experiencing FINALLY, AGAIN!
as much as being cold makes me crabby, hate driving in it, and getting wet socks is by far the worse! it was still fun to watch the flakes come down and the kids get all bundled up and play in it
Snow also means
the best to top it all off
THE HUBBY'S RETURN HOME ---(i would be lying if i told you i was only excited because the whole situation has kinda made me a crazy loony crabby person lately ... i am missing him so freaking much and knowing that he is coming home but who the heck knows when is just driving me bonkers and making me pretty darn irritable :( no good for my co-workers and kiddos and i can feel it when im being that way but i just cant help it or stop it__ I WANT A DAMN DATE OF WHEN HE WILL BE BACK!!!)

Sunday, November 6, 2011


What a poop-tastic day!!!
went to bed not feeling to hot only to wake up even worse :(
we gained an hour of sleep this only happens once a year its suppose to be a good thing!!!
COME ON GOD dont you know these things??
headache. upset stomach. no energy. ears hurt. flem. chest kills! cant even take a deep breathe. so uncomfortable and achey
the chest started last night
I thought maybe it was do to the abundant amount of enhaled dust I took in yesterday as the whole family
tackled grandmas house organizing, throwing stuff away, cleaning, painting, fixing, etc.
Going to get it put on the market asap!
Was so hard being there and not having her there ...and then soon enough we will never be there because the house will be gone idk which is harder!
My stupid ass aunt acted like the whole thing was christmas and seeing what all she could get her hands on to take GGGGRRRR!!!!!!
so it is officially 7 oclock and i am in bed headed to nighty night land

hubby should be headed or heck maybe already there ---KUWAIT!
one step closer to coming home and being together WOOT WOOT WOOT WOOT
I can not freaking wait
have to tell my work this week about the whole situation and how i may just have to up and be gone someday without much notice *I am an associate in a level three special ed room one on one with a kiddo*
hopefully that goes over good
just as soon as my little friend and I got to a good routine and knowing how eachother ticks : WHAM im gunna be a gonner
actually starting to love that ornery little booger
NOT TO MENTION he is learning so freaking much like LOADS AND LOADS of new ciriculum he is just taking off this week and BOOMING its seriously a very exciting thing for me to whitness --recognizing his letters, saying his letter sounds, patterning, ect.  may have taken a long while but we are GETTING THERE we are GOING PLACES :)

Thursday, November 3, 2011

Go figure

The search is on ....
and the hubby thoughts on coming home are very positive CONSIDERING he thinks that we should get a place come the first of December so that when he gets home we have a place
(I'm sceptical because I KNOW if we where to do that then he wouldn't end up coming home for two months or more)

any who my Nnegative Nancy news to share---
so you ask whats negative then?
there is a freaking wait list go flipping figure right?!
ggggrrrrrr the search continues
I'm trying to move on an act like its fine no big deal --but to be honest i was beyond thrilled and now im quite bummed but im not giving up!! i shall fall in love again HOPEFULLY!

HOWEVER, the mother (moms are always so smart and always know best) helped me search for hotels/motels that offer the extended stay!! surprisingly at good rates too no more then we would spend on an apartment even if we where to end up having to stay there for a whole month-- and it may be a good route for us to take so that i we can actually see our apartment before we sign in on it! or have to settle for something because it was available and in our price zone BUT then i think about money and how financially it makes more sense to start paying for an apartment rather then a temporary place to stay
decisions decisions the joys of gamble in the life of the army!
Fingers are still crossed :)

Tuesday, November 1, 2011

Goodbye Oct

Yes it was freaking GORGEOUS here in Iowa today :) just beautiful --no coat needed!!! high of 74 degrees oh and you ask what the weather is tomorrow.......
a big ol 43 degrees with flurry's FLURRY'S seriously
what the heck
joys of IOWA WEATHER --so unpredictable you just never ever ever know!! but I wont complain to much because I really do LOVE IOWA!! GO HAWKS!!

So I have obviously not blogged in awhile ...and I'm sure according to my previous post you all can guess why....
the amazing woman i called grandma time was up and she was called home
Friday October 21,2011 at about 8am
I know she is in a better place -I know she is now pain free -I know she is always looking down on us
i didn't think i could miss the husband anymore then i did but going through all of that without him their was only harder then it already was.  I know it wouldn't have been easy with him there, but i do know that it would have helped to have him there to lean on. to hold my hand. to comfort me. to be there with all of us as one big family. 
One of the things i will always remember grandma asking "when it gets closer to the end will rocky get to come home?"  she wanted him there as much as i did and probably more for me then her
I love her and there are just no words to describe the empty whole i feel in my stomach --yet life just continues on --the visitation is over, the funeral, all the food is gone that people brought, cards are no longer coming in, flowers are dying off, AND LIFE just keeps ticking it just keeps going no one even blinks and we are just to keep up with it all
its a very odd and weird feeling

on a happy note
news today from the hubby ---he will be leaving for Kuwait on the 5th (approximately) and possibly home by mid December SAY WHAT?!?!?! WINNER WINNER WINNER (now only if this actually happens hahahaha i like to ha ha in the army's face because you can honestly NEVER EVER believe anything and if you do you are just setting yourself up for FAILURE)
however just in time to get stressed out !! hahahah ... as if money isn't tight during the holidays anyways why not throw a move across America in there too right?! hahahah quite my job, move back to TX where you have no house, no job, and your husband has no car either
and you don't have money saved up from the last year because whelp you husband didn't actually deploy for a year
okay yes I'm bitching and your thinking
"hello your husband is coming home!!!"
i know i know i know i know
and trust me I'm more excited for him to come home then a kid in a candy shop (but I'm not going to get all sappy and make you read all that because I'm not in a sappy mood I'm in a MY PLATE IS OVERFLOWING mood)
I'm just gonna roll with it --you can never have enough money anyways rite?
and life can never be planned out at least not this kinda life


so therefore with this kinda news the online shopping for a home in TX begins and let me inform you it is a freaking challenge!!! they can be so misleading its not even funny
so home first
because we are number 191 on the military list and our number isn't going to be up come December
then I will begin to search for other things like oh um A JOB

SHOUT OUT to Blue Star Kind Of LIFE : everyone should shoot some words of encouragment that girls way!! life is not easy and its amazing what words can do !!
even though i have not been blogging i have still been following blogs and seeing you quote a comment i made to you ( ) SERIOUSLY MADE MY DAY like no freaking other :)  so thank you thank you thank you
and i am thinking and praying of you often
so excited for you to go visit the hubby :)

Thursday, October 20, 2011

365 Days Later

sssooooo 365 days later
Its the hubby and i's one year anniversary since we started DATING
 (might i mention we have been married for 6 months now too hahahah)
We had been talking for a few months before i finally excepted the fact of having a TITLE wasnt really going to change anything with our relationship and lives at that moment (however this existing relationship im talking about that wasnt going to change was a very exciting DISTANCE RELATIONSHIP and we where not even ever around each other making it an even bigger commitment to sign up for a distance relationship that EVERYONE frowns upon "never work out" "cheating" blah blah blah  i mean honestly who would want to do this?NOONE who would sign up for that type of relationship OBVIOUSLY NOONE would choose that but if you "beat the odds" it makes you a lot stronger.......which LUCKY ME -- WINNER WINNER WINNER i didnt have to go down that path INSTEAD here we are MARRIED and thousands of miles apart!!


and my biggest most HUGE fear of losing my best friend by getting into a relationship with him ACTUALLY ended up being the best decision ever --it made our friendship even stronger!!! my best friend is now my HUSBAND :)


However, I will be the first to admit--I am very ready to have him home DISTANCE IS OVER RATED----im over the distance, im over being strong, im over not getting to do the little NORMAL things that people get to do with their spouses!!!!, im over sleeping alone, im over not having him hear to talk about all the stupid little things, im over "planning" future out "when we are together again" what we will do and what we want, IM OVER NOT BEING IN THE SAME TIME ZONE; SAME LIFE!!!!!!!!! IM READY TO LIVE OUT OUR FUTURE LIVE OUT OUR RELATIONSHIP LIVE OUT OUR PLANS!!!!!!!!!!!

Wednesday, October 19, 2011

25 years down

so this happened like almost a month ago but not quite hahha however with my life the way it is i planned to do it HOWEVER
here i am 
 it was a blast in a glass (okay not quite deena) however it was a freaking blast and a hell-0 good time!!!
so i had to write about it and share this fun idea with all you bloggers :)
first off -- you cant go wrong with blue moon!! you will laugh until you think you are going to pee everytime
and to watch everyone get embarrassed is hillarious too (lighten up people its life you have to have fun)

2nd-- sister and i pulling off the party was so much fun from the planning to the secrets to the stress hahah

lots was going on in everyones life (grandma'S being sick) so the party was smaller then expected, we feared mom and dad where not going to even make it thankfully they did!!!

had their ACTUAL wedding napkins and other things used (name tag was actually their thank you notes but just had their names on the outside) and then their party favors where cute little rolled up poems (dad wrote to mom cough cough NOT! but he tried to say he did hahah he is not really the "romantic" type)

We found old pictures of the two of them
8x10 of their wedding picture for middle of the table for everyone in bar to see hahhahaha

and then we tied other ones to some jars to use as a "centerpiece" in the middle of tables

 best part of all ---all the ladies dressed up in "80s bridesmaids dresses"

we made moms sash and she wore a veil Dad worea  top hat for their actually wedding HOWEVER our's was a little to small for that big head of his hahhaha
Sisters born in the 80s rockin out like they lived in the 80s

Prego at 40? smokin? drinkin? NOT married? WTH

They where so surprised and everyone had such a good time

After this night of fun i decided that you shouldnt need an occasion to dress up instead you should just pick fun "themes" and you and your girls just have a blast with it :)

Monday, October 17, 2011

Blonde or Brunette

So I can honestly say one or the other "do NOT have more fun" then the other
You get to choose your hair and you get to choose your fun :)
and its the one thing i can control ssssooooo when this girls life gets our of control i take control and change my hair just so that i know that i have control over something !!!
its so true though , yes you get the occasional im bored lets make a hair change, but most of time when my life starts to spin and i cant grasp on to things **i change the hair** i think its a good solution hahahha people start to concentrate on that new fact in your life and not the others "hows your grandma? hows your mom? hows rocky?" ggguuuuhhhhhh to much to much to much to much I GIVE IN (hince my title yes im freaking clever lol)
okay so to you few wonderful blog followers of mine voice your opinon please!! :)
which you digging ?!?




what ya thinking?! new girl new attitude new hope ---okay so its just new hair hahaahhaha
                                                     IT'S STILL NEW!!!!!!!!!!!

A different shot both ways so you can get a full effect on the difference (like you couldnt tell already LOL)

Monday, October 10, 2011


i SERIOUSLY already wrote this post once and then it all got deleted !!! :( WTF

sssoooo here we go again and most def isnt going to be as good as the first one-- as always
so this is kinda going to be kinda short and sweet and not at all as gushy and cute as the first one!

For my birthday my husband missed and loves me so much that he shipped himself to me!! :)

HoW rEaL dOeS hE lOoK?!?! kinda creepy and kinda perfect too hahaha

The order got messed up and i didnt get it on my acual birthday, however, it didnt matter to me :) (we where cursed anyways --even the card he mailed to me got returned to him hahah not regular size or something crazy like that)
His hint to me "its 6 foot tall" --okay the farthest thing from my brain was a cardboard cutout of himself hahahah

I took him to the birthday party to surprise the rest of his family ---everyone loved it as much as me :)

Im glad I got to be accompanied --so many events I get to go to alone these days its nice to have the Mr. "tag" along for a change

These boys where very inappropriate and I am not going to be able to share any pictures from them EXCEPT this one!!!

The boys

Shawn & Mom

He was excited to share his birthday celebration with me this year!!! :)



Jada and Chase with their guns

Nana and her soldier

Amazing how much fun a cut out piece of card board can be!! :) But when you miss someone as much as we miss him --well its fun!! its more then fun!!

Tuesday, October 4, 2011

A beyond wonderful weekend!!!! :) the whole family was out at grandmas this saturday deep cleaning and organizing grandmas house just so one she can wake to a CLEAN warm house (she has been so sick and in and out of the hospital often enough without much recovering time to gain strength to clean and do other chores around the house that it was nice we could all pitch in and get the job done it looks 100 times better) she said "it will be so nice to wake to a clean house; it will be so nice to have people come visit and not be embarassed of the house" and at this point all you want to be able to do is make everything and anything a bajillion times nicer for her its really the LEAST that we can do.  She is such a wonderful lady hard to imagine a life without her --at this point her spirits are good, the fight is still on, and the pain tolerance isnt bad yet! We still have our grandma the one we all know and love and hope to have her like this till the day God takes her home!

My Uncle stays with my grandma and helps her with most of her needs. My cousin Kara and I stayed out there saturday for a little slumber party with the grandma and gave him a break for the night to go hang out with friends and get away.  I prolly enjoyed it more then him getting a break!!! idk the last time I stayed out there--all the little things mean so much and can be so much fun.  I really did enjoy myself and am going to stay out there again this weekend.  I am going to color grandma and kara's hair (we have family pictures next weekend --I only wish my husband was going to be here :( makes me very sad)  and just have a girls night again. 
We woke up watched a movie enjoyed our coffee and then packed up to head to the little brothers football game, grandma had not got to see one yet this year and she was very excited.  Packing her up (medicine, walker, chair, oxygen, stuff to stay warm, etc. was POSSIBLY as bad as getting a kid ready to go somewhere hahahah i told her we need to invest in a diaper bag and how they even make cute ones now :) she said "its good practice for you" I only kid because I do not mind doing it at all I actually like it, I like spending time just me and her.

Trey after the game all sweaty and stinky

Doesnt get any better then these two little guys --they are my world!!!

Wouldnt you do anything for that face?

Loves his uncle trevor

made us all a little nervous having him thrown all over the place HOWEVER the giggles and deep chuckles coming from that little body was hillarious; he was LOVIN it

Birthday Party later that day for the other side ---the brother n law and I are a day apart so we celebrated ours together (for tomorrows blog)

Wednesday, September 28, 2011

Literally on a Rollarcoaster

I feel like i have been on a rollarcoaster of emotions lately
one day things are good, the next day you dont think things could get any worse
but right now i am down in the dumbs and im venting on here
its just what i need to do
so stop now if you wish to not here my nonsense of complaints

First off we celebrated my husbands Nana's 70th birthday :)
She is one of the most amazing person i know--she is strong, spiritual, full of knowledge, and would do anything for anyone with that huge heart she has.
All the family got together for dinner and cake (she thought thats all that was going on) --BUT one by one her friends started to show up!! SURPRISE she was so surprised!!! "what did you girls do all my friends are outside" she said hahahah --we all hung out and laughed (fun hearing all the old ladies tell stories hahah just sat back and enjoyed it all)  She is just such an extra ordinary woman and am so glad to get to not only get to call her my nana but also to have her in my family; cant wait to give her some GREAT grandkids
--hard to not have the mr there, he is nanas first grand child and she hold him so close to her heart --

My Grandma headed back into the hosptital, she has been so up and down! as soon as we think things are going to get better they go back down hill! ---she had tons and tons of test done

I then got to celebrate my birthday
birthdays are suppose to be fun
HOWEVER not so much this year
1. my husband isnt here 2. my grandma is sick 3. i have to work all day 4. no celebrating 5. really just doesnt even feel like a birthday!!!!

We recieved the news that my grandma is now terminal. (HAPPY 23rd BIRTHDAY TO ME!!!!)
We are unsure how much time we have left with her
there are going to be so many stages we have yet to go through
and i pray for strength!!!
im not sure if it is a blessing or if it is harder to know that we are now living life on a timeline
everytime we say goodbye i cant help but think if it is going to be the last time or not!!
I lay in bed and my mind overfills with thoughts
my biggest struggle is thinking of all the things she will not get to be a part of
being there for my mom its her mother you always need your mom no matter what you no matter how old you always need your mom i couldnt live without my mom!
my younger brother high school sports, graduation, life
my other brother falling in love getting married being successfull
my sisters family growing her being an amazing mother
my nephews getting bigger learning changing
my husband returning from iraq, us starting our family
i could go on and on and on
its just sad and im just sad

She is so little, so brittle!!
I just want her to get to do everything she wants to do
I just want her to be ready when its her time to go
I just want her to not have to be in pain
I just want her to tell me everything and anything
I just want to never let her go!!!

i quote her "there are going to be a lot of times that we just sit here and cry and thats okay that is just fine"

ssssooooo if you listened to my craziness of life and venting right now i ask for one thing! pray pray pray pray pray for my grandmother!! she needs all the prayers she can get --i know that "see you later" comes for everyone i just want her to find peace in it all "we are sad for us but we are happy for her to get to go spend life with her heavenly father; something we all live to do someday"

Friday, September 23, 2011


yes I have been a stranger, I have decided I am better at reading/following others blogs rather then actually blogging.  I feel like it is probably because 1. My life is far from calm these days (go go go go go gooooooo work is hectic still trying to get in a routine, errands galore and to make things even worse grandmother is back in the hospital and its not looking good at all VERY stressful and hard to take it all in  2. Everynight no matter what time it is when i get home i have to send my husband and email so that we stay connected and he knows what is going on in life back here (which i am so beyond grateful we have and we don't have to communicate by snail mail FOR NOW) however, this does take time. but if i didn't get one from him i know  i would get nervous, sad, curious, aggravated, etc! SO i know he would probably feel about the same exact way 3. I have been getting a lot of reading in i have actually just been CRAVING to read ....i get home from work or other events that i have going on in life and just want to read hahahhah

Sunday, September 11, 2011

Family --River Sand Bank

Yet another weekend is over :)
Anymore I feel like im the most nonproductive person come Sunday night when reflecting my past few days and events that I accomplished.......... it is not even funny ( hahahhaha )
I dread Mondays (don't we all)
but everyday is what you make it
AND with the weekend come and gone only means the countdown gets less and less before Mr comes HOME!!!!

The brother was back this weekend from college and the WHOLE FAMILY including mom went down to the sand bar on the river --the boys where all being boys shooting guns, catching animals, skipping rocks, getting dirty BEING BOYS!!!!
I captured pictures and videos because moments like this
(outdoors, with loved ones, FREE event, --well they make the best memories)
I however got very disappointed when I found out after two minutes that I was Not recording my nephew when I thought the whole time I was hahhaha
Dad/Grandpa had caught him a frog and he was just playing with it like it was his stuffed animal or something hahaha giving it kisses, pulling him in every which direction, and even squeezed him a little to hard that "idk what" just popped out of the little frog EEK OOPS
We are not cruel people and we do love animals but the truth of the matter iiiiissssss we are a hunting family
just how it is --mid western Iowa grown humans!

All Boys
Tucker, McCoy, Ty, Dad, Trey, Trevor

Loving the Water

What we call a diaper wedgy!!

Friday, September 9, 2011

50 rules for dads of daughters


if your a daughter
or you have a daughter with a great daddy

smiles, laughs, tears, and lots and lots of memories!!!

I strongly agree

1. Love her mom. Treat her mother with respect, honor, and a big heaping spoonful of public displays of affection. When she grows up, the odds are good she’ll fall in love with and marry someone who treats her much like you treated her mother. Good or bad, that’s just the way it is. I’d prefer good.

2. Always be there. Quality time doesn’t happen without quantity time. Hang out together for no other reason than just to be in each other’s presence. Be genuinely interested in the things that interest her. She needs her dad to be involved in her life at every stage. Don’t just sit idly by while she add years to her… add life to her years.

3. Save the day. She’ll grow up looking for a hero. It might as well be you. She’ll need you to come through for her over and over again throughout her life. Rise to the occasion. Red cape and blue tights optional.

4. Savor every moment you have together. Today she’s crawling around the house in diapers, tomorrow you’re handing her the keys to the car, and before you know it, you’re walking her down the aisle. Some day soon, hanging out with her old man won’t be the bees knees anymore. Life happens pretty fast. You better cherish it while you can.

5. Pray for her. Regularly. Passionately. Continually.

6. Buy her a glove and teach her to throw a baseball. Make her proud to throw like a girl… a girl with a wicked slider.

7. She will fight with her mother. Choose sides wisely.

8. Go ahead. Buy her those pearls.

9. Of course you look silly playing peek-a-boo. You should play anyway.

10. Enjoy the wonder of bath time.

11. There will come a day when she asks for a puppy. Don’t over think it. At least one time in her life, just say, “Yes.”

12. It’s never too early to start teaching her about money. She will still probably suck you dry as a teenager… and on her wedding day.

13. Make pancakes in the shape of her age for breakfast on her birthday. In a pinch, donuts with pink sprinkles and a candle will suffice.

14. Buy her a pair of Chucks as soon as she starts walking. She won’t always want to wear matching shoes with her old man.

15. Dance with her. Start when she’s a little girl or even when she’s a baby. Don’t wait ‘til her wedding day.

16. Take her fishing. She will probably squirm more than the worm on your hook. That’s OK.

17. Learn to say no. She may pitch a fit today, but someday you’ll both be glad you stuck to your guns.

18. Tell her she’s beautiful. Say it over and over again. Someday an animated movie or “beauty” magazine will try to convince her otherwise.

19. Teach her to change a flat. A tire without air need not be a major panic inducing event in her life. She’ll still call you crying the first time it happens.

20. Take her camping. Immerse her in the great outdoors. Watch her eyes fill with wonder the first time she sees the beauty of wide open spaces. Leave the iPod at home.

21. Let her hold the wheel. She will always remember when daddy let her drive.

22. She’s as smart as any boy. Make sure she knows that.

23. When she learns to give kisses, she will want to plant them all over your face. Encourage this practice.

24. Knowing how to eat sunflower seeds correctly will not help her get into a good college. Teach her anyway.

25. Letting her ride on your shoulders is pure magic. Do it now while you have a strong back and she’s still tiny.

26. It is in her nature to make music. It’s up to you to introduce her to the joy of socks on a wooden floor.

27. If there’s a splash park near your home, take her there often. She will be drawn to the water like a duck to a puddle.

28. She will eagerly await your return home from work in the evenings. Don’t be late.

29. If her mom enrolls her in swim lessons, make sure you get in the pool too. Don’t be intimidated if there are no other dads there. It’s their loss.

30. Never miss her birthday. In ten years she won’t remember the present you gave her. She will remember if you weren’t there.

31. Teach her to roller skate. Watch her confidence soar.

32. Let her roll around in the grass. It’s good for her soul. It’s not bad for yours either.

33. Take her swimsuit shopping. Don’t be afraid to veto some of her choices, but resist the urge to buy her full-body beach pajamas.

34. Somewhere between the time she turns three and her sixth birthday, the odds are good that she will ask you to marry her. Let her down gently.

35. She’ll probably want to crawl in bed with you after a nightmare. This is a good thing.

36. Few things in life are more comforting to a crying little girl than her father’s hand. Never forget this.

37. Introduce her to the swings at your local park. She’ll squeal for you to push her higher and faster. Her definition of “higher and faster” is probably not the same as yours. Keep that in mind.

38. When she’s a bit older, your definition of higher and faster will be a lot closer to hers. When that day comes, go ahead… give it all you’ve got.

39. Holding her upside down by the legs while she giggles and screams uncontrollably is great for your biceps. WARNING: She has no concept of muscle fatigue.

40. She might ask you to buy her a pony on her birthday. Unless you live on a farm, do not buy her a pony on her birthday. It’s OK to rent one though.

41. Take it easy on the presents for her birthday and Christmas. Instead, give her the gift of experiences you can share together.

42. Let her know she can always come home. No matter what.

43. Remember, just like a butterfly, she too will spread her wings and fly some day. Enjoy her caterpillar years.

44. Write her a handwritten letter every year on her birthday. Give them to her when she goes off to college, becomes a mother herself, or when you think she needs them most.

45. Learn to trust her. Gradually give her more freedom as she gets older. She will rise to the expectations you set for her.

46. When in doubt, trust your heart. She already does.

47. When your teenage daughter is upset, learning when to engage and when to back off will add years to YOUR life. If you succeed in doing this, tell me how.

48. Ice cream covers over a multitude of sins. Know her favorite flavor.

49. This day is coming soon. There’s nothing you can do to be ready for it. The sooner you accept this fact, the easier it will be.

50. Today she’s walking down the driveway to get on the school bus. Tomorrow she’s going off to college. Don’t blink.

(sorry about the long posts lately hahah)