Tuesday, November 1, 2011

Goodbye Oct

Yes it was freaking GORGEOUS here in Iowa today :) just beautiful --no coat needed!!! high of 74 degrees oh and you ask what the weather is tomorrow.......
a big ol 43 degrees with flurry's FLURRY'S seriously
what the heck
joys of IOWA WEATHER --so unpredictable you just never ever ever know!! but I wont complain to much because I really do LOVE IOWA!! GO HAWKS!!

So I have obviously not blogged in awhile ...and I'm sure according to my previous post you all can guess why....
the amazing woman i called grandma time was up and she was called home
Friday October 21,2011 at about 8am
I know she is in a better place -I know she is now pain free -I know she is always looking down on us
i didn't think i could miss the husband anymore then i did but going through all of that without him their was only harder then it already was.  I know it wouldn't have been easy with him there, but i do know that it would have helped to have him there to lean on. to hold my hand. to comfort me. to be there with all of us as one big family. 
One of the things i will always remember grandma asking "when it gets closer to the end will rocky get to come home?"  she wanted him there as much as i did and probably more for me then her
I love her and there are just no words to describe the empty whole i feel in my stomach --yet life just continues on --the visitation is over, the funeral, all the food is gone that people brought, cards are no longer coming in, flowers are dying off, AND LIFE just keeps ticking it just keeps going no one even blinks and we are just to keep up with it all
its a very odd and weird feeling

on a happy note
news today from the hubby ---he will be leaving for Kuwait on the 5th (approximately) and possibly home by mid December SAY WHAT?!?!?! WINNER WINNER WINNER (now only if this actually happens hahahaha i like to ha ha in the army's face because you can honestly NEVER EVER believe anything and if you do you are just setting yourself up for FAILURE)
however just in time to get stressed out !! hahahah ... as if money isn't tight during the holidays anyways why not throw a move across America in there too right?! hahahah quite my job, move back to TX where you have no house, no job, and your husband has no car either
and you don't have money saved up from the last year because whelp you husband didn't actually deploy for a year
okay yes I'm bitching and your thinking
"hello your husband is coming home!!!"
i know i know i know i know
and trust me I'm more excited for him to come home then a kid in a candy shop (but I'm not going to get all sappy and make you read all that because I'm not in a sappy mood I'm in a MY PLATE IS OVERFLOWING mood)
I'm just gonna roll with it --you can never have enough money anyways rite?
and life can never be planned out at least not this kinda life


so therefore with this kinda news the online shopping for a home in TX begins and let me inform you it is a freaking challenge!!! they can be so misleading its not even funny
so home first
because we are number 191 on the military list and our number isn't going to be up come December
then I will begin to search for other things like oh um A JOB

SHOUT OUT to Blue Star Kind Of LIFE : everyone should shoot some words of encouragment that girls way!! life is not easy and its amazing what words can do !!
even though i have not been blogging i have still been following blogs and seeing you quote a comment i made to you (http://bluestarkindoflife.blogspot.com/ ) SERIOUSLY MADE MY DAY like no freaking other :)  so thank you thank you thank you
and i am thinking and praying of you often
so excited for you to go visit the hubby :)

1 comment:

  1. I am sorry to hear about your Grandmother. Death is never easy and its never something you can prepare for. Hopefully time will ease your pain and you will always have happy memories to reflect back on.
    I found that the end of a deployment was more stressful than any of the deployment. Keep your head up and remember to breathe. Everything will work out!